Motherhood has been the hardest and most rewarding journey I have ever endured. Every moment of everyday I think am I doing this right, what if he’s not happy, does he feel loved, does he know what love is. I know that no one is perfect and we all are just figuring it out as we go.
Franklin and I had several discussions on if and when we will ever be even ready for baby Frank and once that happened it was all okay just until it wasn’t. About a year ago we started to have talks; do we got this, is it time, should we even think about it, can we try this again.
After much thought, prayer and patience we decided it was time for our family. It was not easy at all. After all we have been through with baby Frank I never thought I would be ready. I know the chances of going through it again is highly unlikely but there are always chances.
Franklin has always wanted children, me not so much, but once we got married it all changed. Once I finally thought I was okay to even think about another child it weighed a lot on me. Do we really want to have another kid and have them fighting this battle with us, would this all take from both of their life. I had all the things to not do it, this is something our family will have to endure forever.
The one thing that had me say yes it’s time yes we can do it is my family, our village, and our faith. My mother raised us as a single mom and has been the stronger woman I have ever seen. She as a single mom was there, always there. My brother has faced many health challenges from a very young age and that strength and care she showed everyday got us all through it.
I sit and look at kids playing laughing and loving on their families and I just know I want Frank to have that. To grow up with his best friend, just like I did. My sister and brother are literally my best friends from day one, as much as we get on each other nerves there is no one else I would like to be siblings with.
We are ready for what this fall will bring. Stay tuned for all the things.
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